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Let's
all become ILLEGALS!!
The
Honorable Tom Harkin
731
Hart Senate Office Building
Phone
(202) 224 3254
Washington
DC, 20510
Dear
Senator Harkin,
As
a Texan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
Service,
I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted
the
Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the
process
for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
My
primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen
to
illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the
Senate
and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's
provisions
is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United
States
for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a
$2,000
fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a
good
deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started
before
everyone figures it out.
Simply
put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay
taxes
every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years
of
taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I
can
apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent
result
for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and
2005.
Additionally,
as an illegal alien I could begin using the local
emergency
room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped
paying
premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could
save
almost $10,000 a year.
Another
benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter
would
receive preferential treatment relative to her law school
applications,
as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges
throughout
the United States for my son.
Lastly,
I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the
burden
of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car
insurance
premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have
college
age children driving my car.
If
you would provide me with an outline of the process to become
illegal
(retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms,
I
would be most appreciative.
Thank
you for your assistance.
Your
Loyal Constituent,
Get
your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service
1-800-289-1040.
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